Angie R. Cox

wife | mom | church planter | social worker | blogger

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No Longer a Bride

June 14, 2017 By Angie 3 Comments

Brandon and Angela Cox Wedding

Today, Brandon and I celebrate twenty years of marriage. I’ve spent more of my life with this man than I did without him.

Most days it doesn’t seem possible; it feels as if it’s just been a few years since I was a nineteen-year-old bride, walking down the aisle of a Kentucky church with my whole future ahead of me.

But then there are other days.

Recently, I was shopping for a dress to wear on an anniversary trip we are preparing to take. I liked the idea of wearing a white dress to signify the celebration of our twenty years of marriage. As I looked through dresses, I came across several that were beautiful and I thought to myself about how pretty they would be on a young bride… but not on me.

It occurred to me in that moment that I didn’t feel like a “bride” anymore.

Brandon often refers to me as his bride.

It’s a sweet term of endearment, and yet it didn’t feel like it “fit” anymore. And I stood there feeling every moment of these twenty years weighing heavily upon me. A whole lot of life has happened in these two decades.

Then, within seconds, those sad heavy feelings took shape into something powerful and beautiful.

I’m not his young bride anymore, I’m so much more.

Twenty years ago, I loved him because he was sweet and kind and because he was crazy about me.

Twenty years ago, I walked down that aisle to the dream of living married life with very little difficulty and lots of comfort.

Twenty years ago, I was a girl determined to get her way and live the life she wanted.

But now… Well now, I am the girl he has fought for. I am the girl that he has chosen every single day for twenty years. I am the girl who has learned to love this man in great sorrow, difficulty, and with a future unknown. I’ve learned that my way and my plans are shallow and empty, but God’s way has grown our love, our faithfulness, and the grace we show for each other over and over again.

During these last two decades, we’ve known great joy through the births of Ella, Sam, and Drew.

We’ve experienced what it means to truly do life with friends who love our family so well. We’ve worked hard and we’ve seen dreams come true. We’ve tasted the goodness of God through his church and we’ve had the sacred privilege of witnessing the gospel transform lives as we’ve planted Grace Hills.

We’ve also known great sorrow in the loss of two babies, and through infertility. We’ve hurt each other deeply and we’ve been wounded by the world. We’ve struggled and felt confusion over what the next steps should be, and we’ve felt genuine fear about our marriage and about our future.

Twenty years of marriage have taught me that you cannot fully experience the goodness of God without knowing your need through suffering. Every tear and heartache have been worth the comfort, clarity, and love that shows up.

Today, I get to celebrate being his bride… and so much more.

Filed Under: Family Tagged With: anniversaries, marriage, weddings

For Those Who Hurt in the Month of Weddings

June 15, 2015 By Angie 1 Comment

Broken Dock

June is the month of weddings. My Facebook feed is filled with beautiful pictures of love. Couples getting married and couples celebrating their years of wedded bliss.  I read beautiful sentiments of love and adoration from wives and husbands. I see pictures of young love with their whole lives stretching before them and you can see the fairy tale dreaming in their eyes.

Yesterday was my turn. My turn to celebrate 18 years of being married to the guy who loves me best. As we shared publicly our love and commitment to each other and received warm “happy anniversary’s” from loved ones, I could not help but think about the countless people who hurt over broken marriages, unrealized dreams and pain of the past. Many of my friends are battling major hurts in their own marriages. So if I could sit with you this morning and share with you from my heart, this is what I’d say.

[Read more…]

Filed Under: Counseling, Family, Grace Hills Church, Women's Ministry Tagged With: brokenness, divorce, love, marriage, relationships, weddings

When Jesus Speaks

July 29, 2014 By Angie 1 Comment

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It happened again. It usually comes out of nowhere when I least expect it. Feelings of hurt, pain and insecurity creep back in and go from a dull whisper to constant chatter. I sat in my car at a red light recounting the hurt, every feeling of anguish and bitterness. I wallowed in the self-pity of it all, feeling rejected and alone. I reached out to my husband for comfort. He did not disappoint with his words. They were words of truth and should have been a sweet salve to my brokenness. But his words were no match for the constant chatter of lies. I lashed out to him. I drove to my office. As I began to try and go about my work, another voice persistently whispered to my heart. “Talk to me”.

Jesus was drawing me to Himself. I shut my computer, opened God’s word and let the lover of my soul speak. When Jesus speaks, my heart is softened. When Jesus speaks, the lies vanish. When Jesus speaks, I am empowered. When Jesus speaks, I love generously. When Jesus speaks, I am set free.

So many times in my life I have looked to others for the affirmation my soul thirsts for. I’m learning that the truth of scripture, the love of my Savior is the foundation I must live my life upon. I’m leaning into Jesus today and listening for His voice. He’s speaking grace over me. What is Jesus saying to you today?

 

photo credit: A Guy Taking Pictures

Filed Under: Church Planting, Family, Women's Ministry Tagged With: brokenness, chatter, Jesus

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Northwest Arkansas Christian Counseling

My greatest desire as a therapist is to give you the space to tell your story, help you identify your struggles, and then move forward toward healing.

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I'm Angie Cox. I'm saved by grace, co-founder and Ministries Director at Grace Hills Church, a Pastor's wife and Mom of three. And I'm also a social worker (LCSW). Read More…

Recent Posts

  • No Longer a Bride
  • For Those Who Hurt in the Month of Weddings
  • Vulnerable and Covered in Grace
  • Healing is a choice
  • When Jesus Speaks

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